Vanover Family Trait

For as long as I can remember, making faces has been part of our family history. I think we can probably blame my Dad. He likes to make people laugh and one of his talents is to make cross-eyed funny faces. Of course, we all laughed, so he kept doing it. Sometime last week I received an email from Daddy with a cross-eyed face picture attached. I laughed, of course.

I also can cross my eyes. So can my Mom and my brother. We don't really do it very often but I have discovered it is a talent that runs in my family and not everyone can do it. So one day, I don't even know when it started, but I looked at my 3 year old, Sophia, and she is sitting there crossing her eyes at me. Clearly, she is doing it for a laugh because she is waiting for me to look at her. Of course, I laughed. It was such a surprise that I couldn't stop laughing, therefore, the reinforcement was made. I am intrigued by the fact that no one taught her how to cross her eyes but she just did it. It must really be a family trait.

Where did we go wrong???

Tonight Brayden came home with a lot of homework to do. He was pretty sad about it too. He wanted to go outside and play. The funny thing is that he blew through the math pages and even concentrated and got his reading homework finished. The problem came about when he had to put together the turkey. A construction paper turkey!!! How annoying! I mean, that's supposed to be fun work at school, at least in my opinion. Most kids like art projects but he wasn't having any of it. He didn't want to cut and paste together the turkey. Maybe it is because it was not coming from his brain and someone was just giving him something to keep him busy. For a second, I was watching him and wondering what this meant about his personality and what kind of work he would gravitate towards when he grows up.

So I asked him. "Brayden, what do you want to be when you grow up?"
He replied, "A Robber."

Uh oh. I think we have some more work to do.

Therapy for the Overstimulated and Overscheduled

Don't get me wrong, my life is good. I have a great husband, sweet kids and good friends. I am just TIRED. Maybe it's because our world is so fast paced and plugged in all of the time. I find myself unable to rest and be quiet. I have to give myself permission to take a break and not be "on" for everyone and everything that pulls me in all directions. When I look at my calendar it is a plethora of details written in different colored markers. It is a little ridiculous.

It is no wonder I finally caught a cold. So today, I am on the couch. I am still doing laundry so that the family won't go naked but that is all I am doing today. Norm took Sophia with him and Brayden is at school so I can rest and recharge. I need this. I have music on and I am just on the couch, my own couch so I don't end up on the Therapist's couch. =)

The Blur that was September

Holy Cow! Is it really the 12th day of October!?!

I love Fall but I am about to miss it! September came and went before I could turn around twice. Mostly due to the start of school and all the activities that go along with that.

Brayden started 1st grade. He came home after the 1st day to tell me that it was "boring" Uh oh. Regardless of that comment, he is reading like crazy and learning math fairly easily. He also enjoys letting the girls chase him on the playground. (what boy wouldn't, right?)

Sophia is back at preschool. She is learning how to be more independent and take on responsibility. It is difficult for her. I find that even when I try not to, I do things for her that she should be doing for herself. She went head to head with her teacher, a move I did not expect from her. Obviously, her teacher, was not manipulated by her meltdown and she realized that if she wanted to participate, she had to act like a big girl! She is better now and learning to write her name and learning a lot of songs that she sings at home while twirling around.

Brayden started soccer while Sophia started dance lessons. We went for a visit to Rhode Island to see family and we went camping for a weekend with friends. We have worked our jobs and visited with friends all while adjusting to the new Fall routine. I am tired just typing all of it!

We are adjusting. Every season is like that. I just have to talk to myself and remind myself to stop and enjoy the moments in the madness.

It's not about me...

In my last post I was feeling pretty rotten about missing that legal draw. I couldn't stop thinking about it and it was in the back of my mind all weekend. So when I headed to work on Monday I needed a little redemption.

I was determined to visit down in the Outpatient Lab and draw a few patients there. When things got cleaned up some in the Main Lab, I went down. I chatted with the main phlebotemist down there. I didn't know her and it was fun to learn a little about what she does and how she interacts with the patients there. I discovered that these patients were names that I recognized through testing but I had never met them. We saw three different patients. They come and chat and talk about their lives. One lady comes in for frequent draws. She had just lost her husband to a sudden heart attack. She wanted to talk about it a little while she was there. Another was a little elderly lady and her caregiver was there with her. She was very ill and had hardly eaten in days. Finally, the third was a little man. He was very slight in stature. He sat down in the chair and waited for us. He had great veins so I asked if I could try. I explained that I am practicing and he was okay with that. I fumbled around a little and I missed, AGAIN.
My phlebotemist asked if I wanted her to do it and the man said, "No, she should try again. That's how you learn, right?" So my phleb gave me some very valuable pointers and it worked like a charm. I got it. The man was very gracious and even complementary. He said,"You are good and you just don't know it. I didn't even feel the needle." I thanked him for giving me an extra shot at it.

Later, when I was back in the lab and running the tests, it dawns on me. I knew that man's name for a specific reason. A Doctor had called me last week and asked that I check on some ordering for one of his patients. It was this man that I had drawn. He said that this man had terminal cancer and he didn't want him double charged for some testing he ordered. I took a minute to dwell on the fact that this man is dying and he could have been grumpy and feeling sorry for himself and justifiably tired of people poking at him. Instead, he was gracious, encouraging and even complementary of me. It's really not about me.

Drawing Blood.

My annual review is coming up and one thing that I really dread is the drawing blood section of the review. I am required to draw one person using correct technique to fulfil my competency report for the year. The funny thing is that when you only do one stick a year, you are not really competent, now are you?

Some Clinical Laboratory Scientists draw blood routinely but at my hospital we have a whole staff of phlebotemists who draw all of our bloods. The time in which I end up having to draw the blood is in legal situations. Only lab technologists and nurses can draw for legal blood draws.

So today, I get an email that my annual blood draw is due. We also had a call out on night shift so it was my turn to stay late to fill in. At the end of my shift, the overhead page calls for a trauma situation in the Emergency Room. We perform testing on this person and they call for a legal blood draw.

I am the only one left to go. Gulp! Unfortunately, I have no one to take with me to help me find a vein. I went by myself and they let me in. I have a sneaky suspicion that the nurse called me because she wants to avoid getting subpoenaed to court for this case. This poor lady is crying and crying and she is in a lot of pain. These are the times that I am glad that I work in the lab because I take these individuals with me home and dwell on them and their stories. Most of the time you are seeing them because they are having a very rough day.

I was brave. I set up my stuff and looked for a vein. Crap! IV's in both arms! They of course, already have the easy veins tied up. Can't find a vein, can't find a vein, the nurses are all sitting around looking at me, the police officer is waiting for me, can't find a vein. Finally, I find one and try it, nothing. The nurse comes in and says, "Did you try over here?" No. But I guess I will. I tried again, nothing. I am so bummed! I wanted to get this draw but at the same time, I felt so bad for this lady. I am looking for veins and she is hanging onto my hand and crying. No one is there with her.

I can't get the draw so I head out to the nurses station. I tell them I can't get it. I feel like a dork. Oh well, I did the best I could with the very limited experience that I have and I did something that scares me. I just wish I was successful. Maybe that is successful, though. If you do your best at something you are afraid of failing at then there must be some success in that?

The other part is the human part. I touched this woman's life for a moment. She was having a bad day and I got a moment to express kindness and compassion to her. Hopefully she will be able to get her life together.

Now, I still have to get that one stick in before my review. Maybe next time.

Tales from a 6 year old's romance.

It happened all of a sudden. Suddenly Brayden was talking about this girl. A girl named Julia. She was his girlfriend. All of her friends told him he was. Then all of a sudden, she wasn't. I don't know what happened but I know how fickle little girls can be but Brayden was really sad. This happened right at the end of school so he has had the summer to talk about it.

He has decided that this is the only girlfriend he will ever have. She is the best girlfriend he could have. He doesn't want any other girlfriend. Then he sadly hangs his head. It is so heartwrenching. Especially when you know, being an adult and all the relationships that are in the future, you want to comfort them with promise of more girlfriends to come. But he is not hearing anything of it.

One day, he is in the kitchen with me and he says, dreamily, "Mom, you know when you see a girl and she has a beautiful face, you just have to tell her, "I am going to be your girlfriend."" I chuckled inside.

Yesterday, he was drawing hearts, one inside the other. I told him it looked like a tunnel of love. He said "Yeah, You and Sophia and the most special girl can go with me in the tunnel of love. Her name is Rachel." When I asked him who Rachel was, he said, "Oh, uh, I mean Emily...no Julia, her name's Julia" I chuckled inside again.

School is about to start and I am wondering what kind of spell this Julia chick is going to have on my boy. We'll see.

My Bad Attitude

It is Fourth of July weekend and I am working. Not only am I working Saturday and Sunday. I am also working Friday and Monday. This year, the whole weekend has been sunny and warm and perfect weather to enjoy the holiday. I am in such a bad mood! I don't even care about the weekend and holiday pay. I just don't want to work! Everyone around me is having cookouts and planning parties and doing fun stuff outside. I just can't shake off the grumpy attitude.

I guess it is because we have good friends to spend time with and the kids are at a fun stage to take places. The 4th is such a Patriotic holiday and I am grateful for my freedom. I love all the pomp and circumstance that goes along with the fireworks and the celebrating. New England is a cool place to be on the 4th and I don't like to miss it.

This afternoon a friend dropped off a treat for me at the lab and people acknowledged that working while everyone else is playing stinks and that made me feel better. Next year, I think I need to remember how bummed I was and try to enjoy it even more. Hopefully it won't rain.

Lipstick and gum

Today, as I watched my daughter finish her first year of preschool, I was surprised at how emotional I felt. I can't believe how fast the kids are growing and that there are times that I our days fly by so fast that I forget to pay attention to the little moments. Today, I was more aware of how quickly time can pass while we just do our everyday things. I made a point to enjoy my daughter and to pay attention to what she was doing today.

Sophia is really into lipstick, well, lip gloss, really. At one point awhile ago I showed her how to apply it and then to press her lips together to ensure even coverage. She does it quite well! So everyday, her routine is to ask for lip gloss and "sparkles" (eyeshadow for the rest of us) on her eyes.

She is also obsessed with chewing gum. Well over a year ago, I caught her chewing an entire pack of gum that she found in my purse. Now that she is a little older, I occasionally let her have a piece to chew. But she asks for it everyday, many times a day.

Today, we were getting me ready for work. I did my make up and gave her sparkles on her eyes. Then we went downstairs where Sophia likes to help me put my lunch and snacks in my bag. She knows what I pack and will bring it to me. As we were getting ready she helped me put stuff in my bag and then she studied my face for a minute. Then she said," Mom, you need lipstick and gum." I felt honored. She was taking care of me. Precious girl.

Just bang it out!

Where does the time go? The last time I posted there was snow on the ground and my bathrooms were both in demolition stage of renovation. Today, I am enjoying my two new bathrooms and there are beautiful flowers and green grass in my yard.

Life has been crazy busy since February. I have often thought about something that I wanted to blog. My dear husband has a favorite saying. "You just have to bang it out." Typically, I would roll my eyes but there is some truth in it. Stop being overwhelmed and worried. Stop analyzing and thinking about how you are going to do it and just do it. So, I'm back and I am just going to start writing again and "bang it out" Stay tuned.

Project Bathrooms: Week One

Our bathrooms are twenty five years old. They still have all their original fixtures and 80's charm. But, it is time to make a change.

Norm left town on Sunday for work so I got to be in charge of everyone, kids, cats, contractors. Monday night into Tuesday morning, I didn't sleep. I was in terrible pain, my head, my neck, my throat, they all hurt. The Lab Scientist in me started running through all the things it could be. Starting with the worst things first, of course. I hoped that my son would remember to call 911 if he found me comatose and septic. I figured since I could still think about all those things, I wasn't in that bad of shape.

545am: The phone rings...school is cancelled due to impending snow storm. Snow Storm!!! I know that Norm showed my how to run the snowblower last winter. I am thinking I will need a refresher by phone. Our contractors arrived and began work. They moved my washer and dryer downstairs to the basement and began ripping down the walls and the ceiling in the first floor bath. Brayden asked, "Why are you wrecking the bathroom?" Mr. Bob, as the kids called him, was great. He worked hard to not make it too messy for us and he made sure that he left a vanity and a toilet for us to use. It didn't start snowing until about 500pm and then it snowed a lot! My snowblowing experience is very limited, but I did it.

Wednesday morning I woke up to a foot of snow on the ground. I had to dig Brayden out of the driveway to get him to the bus. My very sweet and helpful neighbors helped dig us out just in time for some guys to come get our old boiler out of the basement and for work to start again on the bathrooms. Mr Bob started pulling out the floors. Sophia is not feeling so well by this time. We hid from all the noise in my bedroom. Since I am not feeling so well either, I took the kids to Friendlys and called it a day.

Thursday there was more construction and more fever. They built the subfloor for our new shower. Friday morning Brayden threw up on the new subfloor. At least Mr Bob and Mr Kevin could laugh about it. They have kids too. I am sure I will laugh too, later.

By the end of week one, both bathrooms were demolished down the studs. We have a new shower ready to go and a usable vanity and toilet. Compared to the snow and sickness, the construction has not been so bad.

Mema's Chicken and Dumplings

I have been blogging for over a year and I think this is really the first truly Southern entry that I am posting. It is February in New England and I am officially "over" winter. Unfortunately, there is still at least two more months of winter weather and then a couple of months of cold and mud. All that being said, I have been thinking about warm and comfortable things. One thing that comes to mind is my Grandmother's chicken and dumplings.

I have had the recipe for a long time. My Mema, as I affectionately named her as a preschooler, actually told me the recipe and had me write it down. She lived next door to me and my brother and I would go visit and she would make it for us. I can still picture myself in her kitchen. Her kitchen was decorated with strawberries, even on the carpet. We would sit at the white wicker table and eat dumplings...mmmmm.

To make the chicken broth:

4 Chicken breasts and a few thigh pieces
4 cups of water
1 1/2 tsp salt
1 or 2 garlic cloves

Bring the water to a boil and cook the chicken.
Remove the chicken pieces and drop the dumplings in.
Tear chicken pieces and add them back in to pot.

To make dumplings:

1 1/2 cup sifted flour
1 tsp baking powder
1/2 tsp salt
1 tbsp Crisco
1/4 c. milk
1/4 c. water

Sift dry ingredients together, cut in Crisco, add milk and water. If it is to wet, add more flour. If the dough is too dry, add more water. Roll out and cut into squares. Drop in chicken broth and cook 10 minutes, uncovered.

2009 Memorable Moments

Sometimes it is so easy to launch into a new year and think about what's next without taking a few minutes to reflect on the past year and remember all the things that occurred to get us where we are this year. I felt particularly reflective this year. It seems that we changed a lot and experienced a lot of things so I thought that I would just write down the most memorable of our 2009.

In January, we travelled to Kentucky to visit our family. The first couple of days we had a good time and did a lot of visiting. Midway through our trip we all came down with a 72 hour stomach flu, all but one of us. We were all miserable for about 3 days and Norm was stuck taking care of all of us. It was so bad that we still don't talk about it. One of the bright spots of the trip was going to the Lexington Children's Museum. It was so much fun to watch the kids enjoy it and spend time with us and their Grandaddy.

Winter brings the promise of snow. Last year, it occurred to me that if I were at home by myself with the kids during a snowstorm, that I would have no idea how to use the snowblower to dig us out. Of course, my goal is to not go anywhere when it is snowing, but if I had to, I should know. Norm taught me how to run the snowblower and I blew my first few rows of snow. Meanwhile, Brayden demonstrated a "no fear" attitude towards sledding. We found a really good sledding park in town and Norm and Brayden went down together the first few times and then Brayden went down on his own, again and again. Then went down on his tummy and all the while he is yelling, "aaahhhhhhhh!!!!" So funny. I think I am going to get him a helmet for this year!

One of Sophia's big accomplishments this year was that she became fully potty trained at a swift pace. She LOVES Disney Princesses so I bought her Princess undies. That was it, she wanted to wear them and when she went, she got a jelly bean. Done.


One of the most unexpected things that happened to me this year was the formation of a group of girls in town called the Puma Club. It started because our husbands were getting together for breakfast. We girls decided we should start getting together to do fun stuff. I enjoy these women because we come from all different places in life and we have lots of different things to talk about. One of the highlights of our times together was a trip to Boston to have tea and shopping on Newbury Street.

Brayden turned 5 this year. We had a huge superhero party. All of his friends from preschool came as well as some friends from church. It was a beautiful day and they all got to go outside to run and play. Fun was had by all!

Norm's business took off this year. He had a great opportunity to partner with a local greenhouse and received opportunity to work on several big projects in the area. One such opportunity was to be able to give the New Hampshire Children's Museum a landscape make over. On Dover Clean Up Day, we got together a group of friends and we cleaned up the museum front yard. Norm was then able to adopt the museum and can now care for the landscape on one of our high profile points of interest in the city.

Brayden graduated from preschool this year and really enjoyed his summer. He played baseball and really started to enjoy swimming. He is realizing that he has more ability to do the things that he wants to do. He also finally decided that he loved the beach and the waves. I wish we had more opportunities to go but we had a lot of rain and Sophia is not convinced that the beach is fun, maybe next summer.

In June, Sophia and I took a trip to Kentucky to spend time with my Mom and Dad. We had a great time and Sophia was a great flying companion. Norm and Brayden had a guys weekend here. They went hiking and fishing and did "guy stuff". I hope this will turn into a tradition that our kids will look forward to each year.

This summer we did a few fun family outings. We took the subway in to Boston and visited the aquarium. It was very cool. The kids loved the aquarium and being in the city for the first time. We also went up north to Storyland theme park. It was great fun to get away and ride the rides and watch the kids enjoy the park. They are still talking about both trips.

Norm turned 40 this year. We had a big barbeque in the backyard with lots of friends. Norm's brother flew his family up to visit to celebrate with him. It was nice to have them here and the cousins enjoyed playing together.

Fall came and brought about a big change for us. Brayden got on the bus and started kindergarten while Sophia headed to Bunnies and Blocks for preschool. It was a big change for all of us. It is amazing to watch Brayden learning to read. Sophia has shown great interest in art and color.

We wanted to celebrate all of these new things as well as my Dad's retirement. We planned a little beach vacation in Maine for September. Mom and Dad flew up here to go with us. Unfortunately, it was rainy and cold and everything was closed down. We came home early and went bowling. It wasn't the way we planned but we had good quality time together.

Sophia turned 3 this year and all she really cared about were the cupcakes that I made for her birthday. She loves the Disney princesses and jewelry and that is most of what she got.

We signed Brayden up for soccer and he loved it! It was so much fun to watch all those little kids running around trying to kick the ball.

Since I had a little more free time, I trained and ran my first 5K. It was pouring down rain and I almost backed out but Norm encouraged me to do it and I am glad that I did.

In November, H1N1 influenza came to our house. The kids were both sick the better part of November and I had a cough that lasted for a little more than 5 weeks.

Finally, we spent Thanksgiving and Christmas at home. It was a time to establish traditions and be together as a family.

This is the longest post to date and it was fun to look back. Now I am looking forward to making more memories in 2010. Happy New Year.
'

Brayden's Christmas Eve Quotes

"Dad, looking at lights is a waste of time. I want to go put together my Legos."

During a very moving rendition of "O Holy Night" "Mom, when you die, do your eyeballs pop out or fall into your head?"

"Hey, does your shirt light up?" Asked of a lady at church with a very brightly colored sweater.

"Dad, I am a little crestfallen." After he received his Christmas PJs as a gift instead of a toy on Christmas eve.

Merry Christmas
December 2009